🧂 How to “open a deal” with 6 essential principles

Hey there. Happy Saturday! Today, I want to share some thoughts on closing deals in the right way.

We've all been there—stuck in a conversation that feels more like a monologue, wondering when it's polite to escape. But sometimes these uncomfortable moments become our greatest teachers.

Last week, I had a sales call with someone who whom I connected through X. He was commenting literally on every post I share and I appreciated his engagement. I was genuinely interested in connecting and learning more about what he offers.

What followed was a masterclass in how NOT to close deals—and honestly, I'm grateful for the experience because it crystallized everything I've learned about effective sales conversations.

The call was scheduled for 15 minutes. After 13 minutes of listening to his background story, success metrics, and business philosophy, I realized he knew absolutely nothing about me, my business, or my actual challenges. When he asked for another 15 minutes to continue his pitch, I knew we had a problem.

Here's what I learned from that awkward encounter, and how you can avoid making the same mistakes:

How to close deals the right way: 6 essential principles

Listen first, talk second

Give yourself a strict 1-2 minute limit when sharing your background. The magic happens when you ask questions like "What's your biggest challenge right now?" and actually wait for the answer.

In my call, I would have gladly shared my studio's specific challenges if he'd simply asked. Instead, I spent 13 minutes learning about his 25-year journey while he learned nothing about mine.

Your prospects don't care about your experience until they know you understand their current pain.

Read the room (even virtually)

Watch for buying signals AND disengagement signals. If someone starts typing, looking at their watch, or avoiding eye contact on video calls, it's time to pivot.

During my call, I literally started looking away, checking my watch, and even began typing—classic signs of disengagement. But he never noticed because he was too focused on his script.

A simple "Am I addressing what's most important to you right now?" would have saved us both time.

Validate, don't invalidate

When a prospect says "My problem is A," never respond with "No, your real problem is B." When I mentioned my studio's main challenge, he immediately contradicted me and insisted I had a completely different problem—one that conveniently matched his service offering.

Instead of "No, you have problem B," try: "That's interesting—tell me more about A. I'm wondering if B might be related to what you're experiencing?" Make them feel heard, not wrong.

Lead with proof, not promises

Have 2-3 specific customer success stories ready. Not your own achievements—actual client transformations. When I asked for success stories, he showed me his own agency's revenue and Notion docs instead of client results. After 25 minutes, he admitted he didn't have any customers yet.

I was honest: "I don't want to be your first test case. Come back when you have proven results with other agency owners."

Focus on their definition of success

Don't assume you know what matters to them. He criticized my "inconsistent" posting on X as a system failure, but when I explained my strategy—prioritizing quality over quantity—the numbers told a different story. My 7,000 thoughtful posts generated 9,000+ engaged followers, while his 15,000+ posts resulted in only 700+ followers.

We had different definitions of social media success, and neither approach was wrong.

Disagree respectfully when necessary

When he compared his 25-year track record to my one-year-old business, pointing out my meeting lateness and posting patterns as proof I "don't do well" with systems, it felt more like a judgment than genuine concern.

A better approach: "I notice some inconsistency in your posting—help me understand your strategy. Are you prioritizing something else, or is this an area where you'd like more support?"

The real secret? It's not about closing—it's about opening

The best salespeople don't close deals; they open relationships. They create space for honest conversation, mutual respect, and genuine problem-solving.

When someone feels heard and understood, they naturally want to work with you. When they feel judged or misunderstood, they start looking for the exit—literally and figuratively.

The takeaway

Sales conversations should feel like collaborative problem-solving sessions, not interrogations or presentations. The person with the problem should be talking 60-70% of the time, especially in the first half of the conversation.

Remember: people don't buy from people who know everything—they buy from people who understand them.

Here's my question for you: Think about your last few sales conversations. Were you listening to understand, or listening to respond?

Ready to transform your sales approach? Try implementing just one of these principles in your next prospect conversation. Start with asking better questions and actually listening to the answers. You might be surprised how much more engaged your prospects become when they feel truly heard.

What's been your experience with sales conversations that felt more like genuine discussions? Hit reply and share your thoughts—I read every response.

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